Well right now I am quite exhausted.
Yet I am content, which was what I’d hoped for.
So far so good. I can’t say my day felt like ‘meditating’ but I do feel rewarded and refreshed within. I felt like a good parent today, not that I don’t any other day but I always feel like I could do more and today I did it all.
I started at 6am, which I thought would be my biggest hurdle. I used to get up at 5.30am each day but somehow, somewhere whilst pregnant with my fourth, Molly, I began sleeping in until 7.30am. Not too bad, but its amazing how much time I wasted in bed! So I got up at 6, my alarm went off, Glen was already gone for work so it was nice to have a quiet house to myself first thing. Someone yelling from the bathroom saying ‘Mum come wipe my bum!!!’ is not really my favorite thing to wake up to, or hearing someone trying to pick the lock to my bedroom door.
Both of which would be Sophie. My early riser. Like I used to be.
I didn’t get on the treadmill like I’d planned due to somehow hurting my left foot a few days ago (whilst on the treadmill) I’d given it a couple of days off the treadmill but it still hurt, So I thought better than to aggravate it, plus staring at my yellow wall for an hour is sooo not as relaxing as some may think!
But anyhow. I was up and alone and it was nice. I threw on a top and Glen’s trackies and made our bed.
(Some days this doesn’t happen.)
I tidied our room, partly because I feared the moment I left our room I would be bombarded with multiple voices crying ‘we want our breaky’ over and over whilst I try to run the obstacle course which is our hallway to at least pop the kettle on to boil before I am dragged down by all the little hands tugging on me for morning cuddles and ‘how did you sleeps?’
But I opened my door. Slowly. (wrong move….it creaks louder)
It was quiet.
I went to the bathroom and left the door open thinking I would avoid more creaking. (then I freaked out because I was peeing loudly.)
Still it was quiet.
I went to my kitchen and put away the dishes I’d left on the sink (I was too afraid to boil the kettle)
I picked up a few things here and there, I started moving dinner dishes around to wash.
I was actually REALLY glad she was up. I was starting to get lonely. She jumped up on the bench and whispered to me happily while she watched me wash the dishes. I had my coffee and she had a hot cocoa with me. We spent a really nice quiet hour together.
Then I began to hear another little voice, but I realised that I had just had my one on one time with Sophie and she was happy and I really enjoyed it. So I opened Violet’s door and realised she had moved her mattress from her bed to the middle of the floor in her room and had slept there for the night. I sat on it beside her hoping to have a chat with her but she looked at me like a weirdo, jumped up and ran off to put the tv on! Not a cuddler this one!
So I prepared breaky. I made Bella’s school lunch. I put a load of washing on.
This was all before 7.30am! I hadn’t really noticed what I’d been missing.
Anyway the morning progressed and we got ready to walk Bella to school, we all walked her to the corner said our good byes which was so nice to see the girls all happily hugging each other, and now watching them I realised they hadn’t fought this morning. And then headed back around the block. The girls then wanted to go to the park which we could see in the distance, I agreed since it wasn’t too far out of our way even though I was hobbling along and groaning occasionally. My foot hurt but I was enjoying myself and I knew the girls were happy.
We arrived at the park and I whipped out a sneaky snack and a bottle of water for the girls as we realised we wouldn’t be playing on the equipment, someone had splattered mud all over everything and it had baked hard in the sun. (probably be my kids one day if I wasn’t doing this weird 2 week family meditation thing I think I am doing)
We then took the long way home.
The VERY long way home.
The girls wanted to walk all the way to our shopping centre. I was easily swayed as I needed to pick up a few things anyway. It was a long walk. We stopped to smell the flowers. literally. And pick some. We stopped for a drink of water every 5 minutes. We stopped to look at ‘nice’ rocks. We stopped to adjust our hats. We stopped to watch a bird and wonder where it was going.
And I really liked it. I was in no hurry. Where else did I have to be?
We picked up our things, walked home. Checked out a few dead toads on the way.
Considering we’d left at 8.20 and gotten home at 10.40 was not too bad. I really had fun and we all chatted about so much, the colour of our stolen flowers, the way Sophie had pushed her dolly in its pram the entire way without needing me to carry it for her and only complaing just a tiny bit. The way Violet was listening so well and NOT running out on the road. The way Molly was babbling about ‘birdy birdy’ about the wind that kept blowing all our hair in our faces! …..zen….calm…blah blah…that was annoying!
After a few loads of washing, some sandpit play, more kitchen cleaning my foot was absolutely killing me. (Not the best time to have a chronic ache….meditating body, COME ON!) It had gotten so bad it affected my lower back, I was waddling like an old woman. I convinced the girls it was rest time after a light snack at 12.20 Molly slept while the girls watched Toy Story 3 in our air conned room. I lay on my bed dead to the world. I was exhausted. (I may have to get used to this) Though it was at this time I realised that every exposed part of my body was sun burnt. Sun cream for ME too next time.
Once the movie ended we had lunch and some painting. Then some drawing. Then a puzzle. (two puzzles actually, two puzzles which mummy had to somehow work out which pieces go with which, I actually liked doing this, not matter how slow the girls thought I was going. Note to self – organising things is peacful.) Bella arrived home from school, I asked her what she’d like to do and her answer was to make a cake. She made a beautiful looking chocolate cake. She’s always so proud of herself when she does things like this, and so responsible. I think if we can manage to eat the cake in a day she can bake some more. I like to see her happy and confident. We then took a blanket downstairs and threw it out on the lawn. I hung some washing then sat on it. Like I had guessed, I was a magnet. The moment I am on the floor, I am like the lamp that calls to the moth.
The girls came and sat with me, we talked about the clouds and the grass seeds that made them itch. I was then quizzed about my foot which was the excuse to sit ten minutes longer. ‘no, it doesn’t hurt there, or there, OH YES, it hurts there.’
Bella had disapeared for a while and then suddely returned with ‘presents’ for her sisters. Sophie got a hand bag, which I think was actually hers, with some seashells inside. She was over the moon. Violet tore off her paper, she got a sharpener (I inhaled sharply…not the best gift for a child who sticks her fingers in way too many things she shouldn’t and who is also probably the only child who has actually done serious damage to themselves by ‘running with a sharp object’) But anyway she was happy with her gift…Molly received a huge, black spider. Hmm….only play with the plastic kind please baby.
It was sweet and Bella was beaming. She had achieved what she’d set out to. Make her sisters smile. And this is rare!
Then upstairs for some dinner. Then some of Bella’s cake. I must say by now I was a little annoyed which I tried to keep under control. Molly has now begun to climb onto the actual dining table and place herself like a large messy centre piece in the middle of the table. Then she proceeds to pick the choicest bits of food from everyone elses plates. The moment I turned my back she was at it again. I can honestly blame it on the pain (gosh I’m a sook) I was by this stage holding onto the bench top to take pressure off it, pointlessly walking back and forth was a tinsy bit frustrating.
Anyway now they are all tucked up in bed, Glens home and I hope to give him a back rub, or at least a good chat. I know he’s been stressed at work, and god only knows how hard he works for us all.
I feel like so far, I am beginning to achieve what I am determined to gain. fulfillment.
Not once today could I have said I was bored. I had plenty to do because I allowed each moment to be full. I didn’t tell the girls ‘in a minute’ I had all the time in the world for everything they wanted from me, and still time to clean. I did get in a form of ‘me time’ by getting in a couple of hours off my feet.
I think this is going to work. I hope to blog each night and see how I go.
So far so good. I’m really happy, I know my girls are happy, and I know Glen is happy at home with us.
And our house is looking pretty spiffy too.
So yay! Day one down, 13 to go.