Really that’s all I can say.
I didn’t necessarily have a bad day but it was a real eye opener. Glen was home, so this was his first day home during my ‘thing’ (Notice how a few days ago I used the word meditation, then meditation thingy, then isolation and now finally its just a ‘thing’ I am doing. Maybe I do too many ‘things’ and no-one takes me seriously.) Well he was home and really he didn’t do anything different. Actually the kids didn’t do anything different from the usual either. So really it was just me trying to do my ‘la dee da the world is beautiful and I appreciate every single moment of it ‘thing’ and basically get walked all over while I had a smile on my face. One example was after setting out a nice dinner, home crumbed chicken strips with salad on wraps, everyone sat down nicely ate together talked together nicely, thanked me then got up and left me sitting on my own with scraps of food strewn across the table not to mention the lounge room, empty and half empty cups, cutlery where ever it fell. Glen promptly had a phone call to make and the girls disappeared to who knows where until the table which I cleared with a sigh was clean enough for them to ask if dessert was on the way. I considered telling them that if they were tall enough to eat cake over the sink without causing me more washing up or crummy floors, then sure! Eat all the cake you like babies. But no I didn’t I gave them each one of Bella’s baby cakes, freshly made by her this afternoon topped with strawberry icing and rainbow sprinkles.
Sweeping up crumbs? Eh what else do I have to do?
Ok I will complain about one last thing -maybe- before I progress onto the timeline of this glorious day.
Toilet paper rolls.
I am the only person in this house to change the darn thing. I honestly am beginning to belive that I am the only one in this house with the blessed knowledge of the almighty toilet roll change over!
Ok ok. So I got up again at 6am. Which was so dull. Glen was in bed so it completely ruined my little routine I had started. I couldn’t make the bed obviously. Well I could have but I then would have had to later go release him from my firm bed making skills, not to mention the possibility of cutting off his air supply.
So I hung some washing. That took 5 mins, just a couple of sheets. I put away the dishes from the previous night. Loudly. I boiled the kettle and moved around the kitchen making Bella’s lunch. Loudly.
Molly woke, what a nice surprise!
She was happy thank goodness, despite somehow being woken.
Violet woke shortly after which really was a surprise as she’s my sleeper-iner-er. And even more shocking, she was happy too! big hugs and cute smiles.
Fast forwarding a little. Girls dressed and ready to walk Bella to school, Glen, who I’d asked the night before if he wanted to come with us said he did so I went and woke him like the happy dutiful wake up call girl I really am. And we all walked Bella to school.
We came home and packed the girls into the car. Drove the hour drive to Emerald. Picked up some very important lawn mower thing, then went to do our groceries. Molly proceeded to scream almost the entire time. i ended up asking Glen to take a walk down to the fruit section, grab a bunch of grapes to give a few to Molly, this kept her happy. Until she got over the grapes. We then progressed onto blueberries. She was happy. While they were in her MOUTH! I think I had cranky pregnant lady with screaming child written all over my face. Well I know thats what Glen saw it as, but as far as anyone else knew I am pretty certain I can pull off a serene smile and a casual ‘its her nap time’ excuse leaving people thinking ‘oh look, she’s such a calm relaxed mother. A natural.’
Yes, because I can with stand a screaming child while smiling blissfully, not ignoring completely, yet not entertaining the childs unwanted behaviour, I have gained that title.
‘A natural mother.’
Like heck! I just want to look SANE!
I obviously overdid it.
So after shopping which by now my foot was beginning to go numb with pain and I was sick of wincing with every step, my lower back ache which has been annoyed by my new limp was killing me all I wanted to do was sit in the air con car and have someone feed me. But that’s right I promised Glen that ‘next time we were in Emerald I would be the one to go into subway to order our lunch’ But really? Surely I would get some sympathy. With a giggle he said ‘its your turn’ I tried to give the puppy eyes and internally saying ‘Seriously, really?…. I am pregnant and tired, I got up a 6! I was hanging sheets while you slumbered away, I have changed 3 nappies this morning, two of which contained the yuck stuff, I picked up toys, and swept the floor, listened to the girls annoy each other. I just spent an hour making my foot worse while searching the shelves of our shopping centre to create you marvellous daily meals…..for goodness sakes no. Your not serious?’
Oh yes he was.
He smiled sweetly from the passenger’s seat while I limped off. I felt like exaggerating but then I noticed the two men out front have a couple of looks my way and I figured he’d regret sending me out there to be perved on more than in pain. Though I smiled. I was making him ‘happy’ which is the main reason for my 2 week hibernation thing -I just can’t think of nice words for it now.-
I do feel a sense of ‘what about me?’ creeping in. I’ve been trying to change my mind frame so I can wake each morning fresh and happy. I mean I do, but I wanted to be passionate about doing everything I do for everyone not feel like it’s just a chore. I want them to know that I love them and every moment I spend on them, I want them to have a beautiful and clean house to live in.
This is tough. No one seems to be trying to make me feel loved and appreciated. And it seems the harder I try the worse I am treated. I felt hard done by before but now, it really is slave labour and after the last couple of days of trying to enjoy the good with the bad I haven’t complained that I am the only one in this house with a set of hands capable of picking things up from the floor.
12 hands only 2 working ones?
I don’t mean wash windows or sweep floors, I mean when you drop something on the floor, pick it up.
The majority of people in this house are way closer to the floor than I am anyway!
Oh my, I think I said somewhere up there that I wasn’t complaining? I apologise to myself, thought I am not giving up, I will just have ANOTHER talk to my loved ones and remind them of the purpose of this excercise.
To show each other love and appreciation. To enjoy the time we spend together and help each other.
THAT INCLUDES ME!
HELLO, MOTHER OVER HERE!
So day 3. Teaching me a lot.
To tell you the truth I am glad I don’t have the pressure of people randomly turning up to my house needing to be entertained. My house is the cleanest its been in a long time too. Keeping it that way is a constant battle. I will lose eventually. I always do. I never quit however. And I know that if I can get the rest of my clan on board then day 3 will be forgotten amongst all the loving sharing days ahead. (I could almost laugh out loud right now. Did I really just say that?)
Ahh, good night. Off to make my other half happy.
He’s just lucky he’s adorable and lovable!
Maybe thats my problem, I need to turn up the cuteness!